Confessions of a Sappy Momma.

Hi...I'm Crystal...and I am addicted to my kids smile and laughter.

God, I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE that kid...he is so happy, so full of joy and I want it, I need it!

There is nothing better than seeing how happy he is and how much joy he gets out of the simplest of things, out of everything and nothing at all. There are moments when I get "down," then I look at him, he smiles at me or giggles and just as they say it, "he chases my blues away." It's true, its so true...it happens everytime. Everything is so small compared to how big he is.

He is such a good kid, he is beyond wonderful. He is out of this world. He was and is the desire of my heart. He is the best part of me. He is PERFECT, yea he is, because I'm his momma and I SAID SO! I love being a Momma- I wish ya'll could see my heart and know how much, words just dont come close. My dream, my life's goal is to be who I am in his eyes. You have made me so happy kiddo, you put a smile in my heart forever...everyday.

Who would have ever thought an addiction could make you feel so darn good?!?!

"A smile starts on the lips, a grin spreads to the eyes, a chuckle comes from the belly; but a good laugh bursts forth from the soul, overflows and bubbles all around."

giddy for my love.

Status: Married and loving every second of it.

I am SO pleased to announce that I have a hot date this Thursday with the hubbers. I think it has possibly been a century since we last had a date. The last time was actually for his birthday and we had so much fun that I was ready to go back out the next day, lol... We are a bit freaky when it comes to leaving our kid- since my family moved this past summer we haven't really had our handy dandy babysitters and thus the "dates" have been a bit lacking. We of course do fun things at home such as movie night, take-out, games, and simply just hanging out and those times warm my heart and I, of course, cherish them. However, there is just something about getting all fancied up and going out that tickles me and gets me all giddy! Tomorrow, I will make the half way haul to pick up my wonderful sister who has so generously offered to come stay with us for a couple of days to keep lil' man for our night out on the town. (*insert squeal here...and special thanks to my super-mom for meeting me.)

I can't even begin to write how excited I am about it, as if by reading this you cant tell....So I know the wonderful readers that you are- are wondering what our super fun night is going to consist of... well, we are going to the movies to see "Shutter Island," I am so excited to see it, I should say "we"- because he gets as giddy as me about going out. We have wanted to see it for MONTHS, since last year when the trailer was released. I love getting all the fixings at the theater, so I'm sure we will have popcorn, candy and drinks (*insert another squeal here), and of course we will have dinner as well- can't have a hot date without a yummy dinner. It will be a WONDERFUL evening out with my WONDERFUL husband... I know ya'll are just so excited for me, right?!?! :)

**On a side note, I just wanted to point out how truly wonderful he is. I know ya'll probably get tired of hearing me say it or in this case write it- and ya'll probably wish that I wouldn't so often, but how can I not?!?! I am so proud to be his wife and I simply cannot contain my joy. I feel like I have a prize in him and if I could I would share it with the whole world. He has always been a sweetheart and so romantic, he is a shower-er of praise and love. He balances me out, he is my best friend (and God, I am ever so thankful), he is loyal, honest, sincere and trustworthy, he is the man that I dreamed about as a little girl and is now beyond real (and has been for the past 8 years and counting.) He is the king of my heart. If I tried to write all that I love about him, we would be here for, well, HOURS and I am sure that it is only interesting to me, lol... Sometimes I take him for granted, but there isn't a day that goes by that I don't tell him how much I appreciate him, all that he is and all that he does for me and for our family. I have to say that I feel I am the luckiest gal in the land.

Did I mention that I cannot wait to get all fancied up and go out on the town with my main man?!?! (winky face).

~much love ya'll, and thanks for reading my giddy ramblings about my love~

perfectly perfect.

This is life...

This is happiness...

This is Love.

...

This is my new, could be all time favorite portrait of my guys...you can see and possibly feel my love for them transcending thru the photo itself. I have looked at it probably a million and one times and the way that it makes me feel is indescribable. The smile that's lights up my face warms me all the way to the tips of my toes. I am not perfect, however, my love for them is perfectly perfect.

shadows in the light.

I took this class in college and what I learned really stuck with me. I long to do it in the photos that I take, the things I write, and the life that I lead as well, what I learned was this. Do something and be someone that has a meaning...Everything has a meaning, not necessarily a hidden meaning, but it means something different to everyone. The way we read something, the way we view something, how it speaks to each one of us is different. We can use the same "way," we view something, what I mean by saying that is for an example, do I want to look at a situation positive or do I want to automatically view it as negative. For me personally, I look at life through eyes of hope- and I think I have said it many times before that I am hopelessly hopeful. I am always hoping for the BEST outcome, even in a negative situation I try to flip it and view it as a learning experience, something that will challenge me to be better, to do better, a circumstance good or bad that I can grow and learn from.

I took this portrait of my son and when I got the chance to look at it and REALLY "see" it, it made me "think." I thought and pondered about several different things that leaped out at me so to speak. (*On a side note, I would just like to say that I LOVE when something speaks to me, when it makes me think. )
My first thought of course being how big my guy is getting...What a blessing it is to be able to watch him grow and turn into an amazing man. I saw him looking out into the world with his heart full of dreams, dreams that haven't even been dreamt yet. Where will he go, what will he do?!?! Whatever lies ahead, wherever his path leads, he will always be larger than life. I then saw his little shadow, which turned into a thinking process and research on wise words about shadows, which I will share later.
First...my thoughts- We all have a shadow. Shadows follow us into the light. Our actions cast shadows on people-good or bad. We can live in the shadows of someone else or we can be who we truly are. Shadows are shade that allows for a breath of fresh air. Sometimes our shadow is bigger than we are. Shadows are silhouettes. Shadows are forever, they never go away. Shadows can be haunting. Without shadows how would we know how we measure up? Do we sometimes live in the shadows of the past? or the shadow of things yet to be? If you always feel as if you are living in someone else's shadow, remembe there is someone who is living in yours. Shadows have a bad reputation, but is that deserved, isnt it only a truth of something or someone? Sometimes we see shadows, but there is nothing on the other side. Shadows show us detail. Shadows show our burdens. Shadows paint a picture of black all that we hope to be. Shadows showcase beauty, and they can be an ugly sight. Do we embrace our shadow or are we scared of it because it shows truth...

I don't know if at times I understand my own way of thinking and if I truly know how much of a jumbled up mess my brain is...whether these thoughts mean anything to anyone, they do to me. I don't know if they make sense to anyone else-however, they are enlightening to me.
The reason for the entry being, I simply wanted to share my thoughts on something as simple yet as complex as a "shadow." Now, as promised...wiser words than mine (not that mine are in the least bit wise.)

-"Everything that we see is a shadow cast by that which we do not see."
-"I have a little shadow that goes in and out with me, and what can be the use of him is more than I can see."
-"It's very easy to say that something is a shadow of itself, and it may be true in some senses."
-"We are shaped by our thoughts, we become what we think. When the mind is pure, joy follows like a shadow that never leaves."
-"I decided long ago to never live in anyone's shadow, if I fail or if I succeed, at least I did as I believe."
-"Because everything we say and do is the length and shadow of our own souls, our influence is determined by the quality of our being."
-"For me, it's even more interesting, because my character comes out of the shadow..."